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When in Doubt, Talk it Out: Tips for Resolving Conflicts at Home

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It’s no secret that adolescents’ emotions fluctuate—in fact, that may even be a kind understatement. Between puberty, hormones, issues with self-esteem, and peer pressure, it is no wonder why conflicts are plentiful among preteens and teenagers. As a parent, watching these melodramas escalate into full-blown conflicts can be not only difficult, but also confusing. Do I stay out of it? Do I offer advice? Is this a serious issue, or something that will blow over? What your teen really needs is an opportunity to talk it through with a willing listener.

Like many of us remember, small conflicts, whether between siblings or friends, can quickly escalate and become blown out of proportion. Our adult mindset likely wants to tell a worked-up youngster to simply calm down. However, nothing revs up adolescents like telling them to calm down…

Instead of telling your teen to “calm down,” model the appropriate behavior. Show him or her different methods for relaxing. It could be as simple as taking a quick “cool down” moment to process their emotions before reacting. Some find exercising, reading, or doodling to be therapeutic methods for redirecting negative energy. Whatever the case may be, the take-away here is that nothing good can come from impulsive, emotional reactions during a conflict. Explain that a rational discussion is always more beneficial than a heated argument.

After a chance to think through his or her emotions, ask your teen to talk out the issue. What prompted the conflict in the first place? How did communication lines get crossed? What was the other person trying to achieve in the moment? This reflective process allows teens to practice perspective-taking, a skill that is not necessarily developed until later.
Discuss how to apologize well. This is a skill that some adults still struggle with from time to time. An insincere apology is no better than no apology at all—both are equally void of any true remorse or understanding. Teach your teen the value of an apology—that even when it is hard to do, articulating remorse is a social skill that he or she will need to have developed by adulthood. Will it always come easily? No. We all have moments when our stubborn need to prove correct outweighs the desire for amity. However, ask teens what they think will be more important in the long-run. Is this conflict something that they must play out? Or, is the friendship/relationship more valuable than the desire to be “right”?

Remind adolescents that conflict resolution is not a one-size-fits-all. Depending on the person(s) involved and the circumstances attached to the disagreement, each conflict will need to be handled differently. It should also be said that conflicts are not always resolved at the drop of a hat—it is a process, one that takes time and patience on behalf of both parties. Explain that, much like any important skill, resolving a conflict is tricky, and it’s okay to stumble along the way.

By serving as a confidant and role model, you can ensure that your teen acquires the skills to assess and resolve conflicts large and small.

Twice-Exceptional Students: Common Misconceptions

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Parents of twice-exceptional (2E) students know all too well that their child’s learning can be more complicated than expected. Twice-exceptional students, once referred to as GTLD, are characterized by their gifted abilities and the fact that they meet the criteria for an IEP or 504 plan. With such a unique combination of learning strengths and weaknesses, it is no wonder that these learners are unfortunately misunderstood in the classroom. For parents, this can be even more disheartening. However, there are proactive measures that parents can take to help to mediate any future concerns.

Encourage your child to use his/her strengths as a head start or springboard in school. This means that certain skills or tasks can be made easier when students play to their strengths. For instance, if drawing and diagramming is a strength, but written communication or explanation presents an issue, encourage your child to sketch an explanation to a math problem, as opposed to writing it out. Your child is still completing the task and mastering the concept of explaining steps in a math problem; however, he/she is simply arriving at a response in a different manner. A major aspect of learning involves capitalizing on one’s strengths and maneuvering around weaknesses, which is exactly how 2E students can truly shine in the classroom. It is an unfortunate misconception that these unique types of learners are aloof or disinterested. This is simply not the case—quite the opposite, actually.

For twice-exceptional students to be able to exhibit mastery in alternate ways, parents must practice open communication with classroom educators from the get-go. While this sort of request could be misinterpreted, 2E students and their families are not seeking special treatment. They simply recognize learning strengths and their value. Parents should not be wary about these accommodations—differentiation is part of a teacher’s best practices in the classroom. But, in order to help our students, we must be made aware of their strengths and needs.

Twice-exceptional students, when either too challenged or not challenged enough, may become despondent or reluctant. A student’s boredom or frustration in the classroom can often be met with the same reaction—indifference. Again, parents should communicate these visible behaviors to the child’s teachers. The unfortunate truth is, teachers may potentially begin to see a 2E child’s reaction as “attitude” or “laziness.” These types of labels are obviously detrimental to a student’s education. Explain to teachers that your child’s manner in class is a reflection of his/her struggles—that varying the concept, task, or activity is a simple quick-fix.

Encourage your twice-exceptional student to keep a journal for reflection. This is a practice that not only allows students to track their own academic growth, but it also allows students to recognize patterns of strengths and weaknesses. When students understand themselves as learners, they can truly begin to become agents of their own education. The power of knowing how to succeed builds self-confidence, as well.

National Special Education Day: Instruction for Twice-Exceptional Students

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The second day of December marks an important day in education. National Special Education Day may be widely unknown to most people outside of the classroom; however, its significance is notable. This special day, which officially began in 2005, marks the anniversary of the signing of our nation’s first special education law passed in 1975. IDEA, or the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act, ensures that students with disabilities are entitled to Free Appropriate Public Education (FAPE) that suits their specific needs.

But what does this mean for twice-exceptional (2E) students? This type of unique learner, once referred to as GTLD (gifted/talented and learning disabled), requires specifically differentiated instruction beyond the typical special education accommodations. So what does this type of instruction look like in the classroom? Take a look below to see how best practices can ensure the success of twice-exceptional students.

Twice-exceptional, previously referred to as GTLD, means that a student has been identified as gifted and also meets the criteria for an IEP or 504 plan. These students could have Asperger’s, vision or hearing impairment, ADHD, or an emotional or learning disability. While we know that every learner is unique, twice-exceptional students have an even more complex need for differentiation. These students often experience difficulties in processing speed, working memory, written expression, executive functioning, attention and self-regulation, and social skills. While these struggles could obviously interfere with learning, the flipside of 2E students is their unique strengths. Students are often articulate, advanced readers with advanced verbal skills. Their gifted verbal abilities mean that these students would greatly benefit from tasks and assessments where their mastery is measured orally. Instead of a research paper, essay, etc., provide these students with the opportunity to present their findings verbally, organize a speech, or participate in a debate. A simple spoken exam or assessment could prove much more beneficial than a written response or multiple choice test.

Because twice-exceptional students acquire knowledge and concepts quickly, they may appear bored or aloof in class. They are known for rapidly acquiring conceptual knowledge and have a natural ability to think critically. Because of this, review activities, rote memorization, and tasks involving simple recall are not preferred. These sorts of tasks have the potential to cause twice-exceptional students to “check out.” Anything that seems repetitive, elementary, or mundane will likely be received as irritatingly simple, causing 2E students to zone out or avoid the task all together.

2E students are typically inquisitive and thrive when exploring, questioning, or investigating. These students often have strengths in problem-solving. So, provide them with hands-on learning opportunities—tasks that allow them to deconstruct, build, or question the functionality of something, and play to their strengths and interests.

Twice-exceptional students tend to think that others see them as lazy, unmotivated, or stupid—this could not be farther from the truth. These students simply have different learning needs. For instance, 2E learners often find easy tasks to be difficult and difficult tasks to be easy. They may be able to build a perfectly proportional model bridge; however, if asked to explain how they arrived at the dimensions mathematically, they may struggle greatly. In these instances, the students simply “knew” how to complete the task or skill—but they will not be able to provide a detailed explanation of how they did it, or why. Because of this ability to simply “do,” 2E students thrive when given choices and differentiated opportunities to display their talents. This sort of strength-based learning means that they should be given opportunities for acceleration and enrichment, creative independent study, and study groups with other GT students.

How to Keep Up After an Absence: Middle School Part 2 of 3

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Tis the season…for absences. The height of flu season, combined with the holiday season, tends to create a notable increase in student absences from school. Whether families are traveling over the holidays, vacationing, or fighting off illness, this time of year means that, for one reason or another, students are missing more school. So what can be done to ease the stress of returning to school after a long absence? For middle school students, parents should act as a “silent partner.”

Not surprisingly, elementary-age children need a little adult monitoring and management when it comes to extended absences from school. However, middle school is all about self-advocacy and accountability. This means that parents definitely should play more of a hands-off role than they previously have. Of course, parent involvement should never disappear fully. So, how can parents encourage responsibility while still ensuring student success during an absence? Let’s take a look.

Be proactive

Of course, some occasions simply do not allow for planning—the stomach flu is not going to afford a family the opportunity to plan ahead for a multi-day absence. However, vacations, family visits, or religious observances are things that can and should be planned for. Emailing the school a week or two prior can make all the difference when it comes to prolonged absences. The difference in middle school is that your child no longer has one main teacher—there are likely six or seven teachers who will need to know about a prolonged absence. Make it easy on yourself by emailing the guidance counselor. Then, he or she will make sure to inform all of your child’s teachers about the future absence. Also, encourage your child to remind his or her teachers of the upcoming vacation or holiday.

Take work home

Ask the school if your child should take future school work home prior to the absence. This will allow for a head start on the missed assignments, which will also reduce stress or anxiety for your child. Encourage your middle schooler to complete the work in small bits during any downtime while absent. Also, be sure that your middle schooler has written or logged all assignments prior to the absence. This will ensure that your child is well aware of the work that will need to be completed.

Utilize technology

If your child is currently reading a novel in class or for a research project, seek an audio version before the absence. Ask your middle schooler to check the school’s library or media center to obtain audio copies of the school texts. If not, many audiobooks can be found for free on youtube. A set of headphones and a tablet are all that are needed to keep your child from lagging behind in his or her schoolwork. Audiobooks act as a way to occupy children while travelling, as well. Consider balancing out their school text by bringing a second audio book just for pleasure.

Prioritize the workload

A notable distinction in middle school is the sudden increase in homework and projects. This can mean A LOT of missed work during a prolonged absence. As a parent, you know what your child is capable of handling in terms of workload. Encourage your middle schooler to be realistic about completing the work. If work has piled up to an unrealistic amount, choose the most important assignments or readings—then have a conversation with your child’s teachers. If your child is comfortable handling the conversation, have your middle schooler explain any missing work to his teachers. Encourage children to be honest about the amount of downtime they had, and how they truly attempted the assignments.

Have your child keep a journal

If teachers are unable to provide make-up work with short notice, have your middle schooler complete a daily journal of his or her trip. This not only provides your child with a little bit of academic work each day—it also acts as a keepsake from a family vacation or holiday. The journal does not have to be written—consider allowing your child to keep a video journal or a typed diary during the trip.

Teaching Gratitude

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Educators are often held to the lessons, objectives, and standards of our set curricula. With all that needs to be “covered,” there is likely not a ton of wiggle room. Of course we are passionate about our content areas; however, there also are often larger truths that we would like to touch upon during instruction. With such little time devoted to non-curricular instruction, it is always a nice surprise when time permits a small window to discuss things outside of the content area that are no less important.

This time of year is a beautiful one, full of family gatherings, holiday festivities, and building memories with close friends. We often become so wrapped up in the holiday spirit and merriments that we fail to look around and realize how truly fortunate we are. That said, it is a favorite activity of mine to focus some instructional time on gratitude. As a middle school teacher, I find it especially beneficial to take a bit of time to discuss this concept with my adolescent students. It is typical, and quite biological, actually, for teens to live primarily from their own perspective—taking little time to think of others before thinking of themselves. With Thanksgiving and the winter holidays in the forefront, this is the perfect time of year to give thanks.

So how do I prefer to do this in the classroom? It may sound predictable and run-of-the-mill, but my activity focusing on anonymous thank you notes proved to be very inspiring this year. Students were given as many blank gratitude notes as they wanted—nothing fancy, just a turkey saying “thank you” and a space for a brief message. The only instruction? Thank someone sincerely and anonymously for something that they did to bring positivity to you. The point is to be completely candid, while remaining anonymous. This way, the focus is on the receiver, the person for whom each student has felt grateful for in one way or another.

I assumed that many students would send thank you notes to their best friends, and many did. However, what surprised me the most were the thank you notes that went a little deeper than I had anticipated. Things that had occurred in the beginning of the year, when some students were virtual strangers, were remembered fondly. Some thank you notes indicated that one student’s kind gesture sparked a true friendship, while other notes came from students who run in completely different peer groups.

Even more surprising and heartwarming were the thank you notes that several teachers received from students. Simple, anonymous thank you notes from my thoughtful middle schoolers showed me that gratitude was something that we can all exhibit and learn more about every day. Some notes thanked a teacher simply for making learning fun; other notes thanked teachers for sharing their lunch with a student who didn’t have anything to eat. The larger take away message here was that we may not know how a small, kind gesture can turn someone’s day around. Even the slightest act of kindness proved to be memorable for many kids.

Yes, we are tasked with teaching our lessons, concepts, and topics, but the social environment that schools provide allows students and teachers to learn important life lessons as well—including gratitude.

How to Keep Up After an Absence: Elementary Part 1 of 3

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The winter weather, combined with the holiday season, tends to create a notable increase in student absences from school. Whether families are traveling over the holidays, vacationing, or even getting hit with bouts of the flu, this time of year means that, for one reason or another, students are missing more school. So what can be done to ease the stress of returning to school after a long absence? For elementary-age students, parents play a key role.

Not surprisingly, elementary-age students need a little adult monitoring and management when it comes to extended absences from school. Often times, it is the parent or guardian who decides when a child needs to be out of school to begin with—children do not schedule their own vacations, nor do they make the final call when they are ill. Therefore, the best advice for elementary school children is directed towards parents.

Be proactive

Of course, some occasions simply do not allow for planning—the stomach flu is not going to afford a family the opportunity to plan ahead for a multi-day absence. However, vacations, family visits, or religious observances are things that can and should be planned for. Emailing the school a week or two prior can make all the difference when it comes to prolonged absences.

Take work home

Ask the teacher(s) if your child should take work outside of school prior to the absence. This will allow for a head start on the missed assignments, which will also reduce stress or anxiety for your child. Encourage your child to complete the work in small bits during any downtime while absent.

Utilize technology

If your child is currently reading a novel in class or for a research project, seek an audio version before the absence. In fact, many audio books can be found for free on youtube. A set of headphones and a tablet are all that’s needed to keep your child from lagging behind in his or her schoolwork. Audiobooks act as a way to occupy children while travelling, as well. Consider balancing out their school text by bringing a second audio book just for pleasure.

Prioritize the workload

Hopefully, elementary-age students are not seeing loads of work at this point in their education. However, statistics show that many children are completing 1-3 hours of work each night. This could mean staggering amounts of make-up work if absent for a week. As a parent, you know what your child can and should be doing in terms of homework. Be realistic about the completion and try not to have your child overdo it. If work has piled up to an unrealistic amount, choose the most important assignments or readings—then have a conversation with your child’s teacher. Make-up work should not be seen as a punishment for prolonged absence.

Have your child keep a journal

If teachers are unable to provide make-up work with short notice, have your child complete a daily journal of his or her trip. This not only provides your child with a little bit of academic work each day—it also acts as a keepsake from a family vacation or holiday. The journal does not have to be written—consider allowing your child to keep a video journal or a typed diary during the trip.

Behavioral Techniques for Children with Learning Disabilities

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When it comes to education, there are few things that make or break a lesson like behavior management. Instruction is only as good as a student’s ability to receive it. If behaviors are out of control, the learning environment will be undoubtedly compromised. With classrooms of 30 or more students, effective behavior strategies can range far and wide—just like the many personalities in the classroom. While it may often come down to trial and error, some specific behavior techniques are known to be more effective for students with learning disabilities.

One important aspect of behavior management for students with learning disabilities is to create a classroom environment that is structured, but not rigid. Structure provides students with distinct expectations, both academic and behavioral. To set a standard or expectation from the beginning is a proactive way of staving off unsavory behaviors before they even emerge. However, as we all know, behaviors are typically an effect of some specific emotion. When emotions or reactions take over, especially for students with learning disabilities, it is beneficial that educators have a repertoire of behavioral techniques to try.

For students with ADHD…

Consider what is and is not within the child’s control before issuing a punishment or redirection. A child with ADHD is often impulsive and unaware of his or her own outbursts or comments. There is a difference between a child who is disruptive and a child with attention issues who is not intentionally troublesome. Therefore, the behavior techniques for an interruption must fit the circumstances. Instead of harping on the outburst immediately, as in the case of a disruptive student, give the student a silent cue to remind him or her of appropriate behavior in the class setting. Often times, simply making eye contact with a child will remind him or her to think and raise a hand before speaking out.

Another helpful behavior technique for students with attention issues is to use proximity. When a student is placed closer to the adult in the classroom, he or she will be more inclined to listen, track the speaker, and remain focused. Proximity also helps to remind students that they are in plain view of the teacher at all times. This technique assists when executive functioning is compromised and a student’s focus strays easily.

If a student with ADHD seems unusually fidgety or distracted, allow him or her to take a brain break. This one to three-minute movement break allows students to expel pent up energy or anxiety. The small time gap of movement also helps students to refocus and check back in if attention has been lacking.

For students with non-verbal learning disabilities…

Create a simple, structured outline for the day’s lesson. This will help a student who struggles to transition from task to task, or becomes easily frustrated if he or she feels “left behind.”

An outline or small sticky note indicating the day’s lesson will also prevent a student’s need to ask repetitive or unnecessary questions. These behaviors are typical for student with a non-verbal learning disability (NVLD)—including the inability to read facial expressions or interpret body language.

A student with a NVLD may also appear clumsy, careless, or uncoordinated. Preferential seating, either close to the teacher’s desk, pencil sharpener, door, etc., helps keep this type of learner from unnecessary roaming.

Homework: A New Approach for Teachers

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It should come to no surprise that students and parents are feeling the stress of mounting homework assignments. It is not uncommon for elementary schoolers to complete a few hours of homework every night. The subject of homework and how much is too much has become somewhat controversial, especially recently, when we are seeing children diagnosed with depression and anxiety at an alarming rate. Elementary students in America today are stressed, overworked, and over-scheduled. Regardless of how families may contribute to the “over-scheduled” child, we educators must be cognizant of the reality that homework for homework’s sake is hurting our students. It appears that, after much consideration and research, many schools are changing their stance on the implementation of nightly homework. That said, how can we change our own visions of what homework is meant to accomplish?

Let’s take a look at some alternative perspectives on how homework could be implemented differently in today’s public schools.  

Some schools are doing away with homework altogether. The argument behind this movement is that students are wildly overworked, over-tested, and overly stressed. Since even elementary schools have shifted their instructional focus from socialization, imagination, and creativity to a heavier emphasis on academics, it makes sense to cut homework from the agenda. Consider this—students as young as kindergarten and first grade are seeing more curriculum-based instructional time than ever before. Coloring, sharing, napping, and imaginative play are largely things of the past, replaced by advanced curriculums and content-specific lessons. Since the school day has become more grounded in more difficult school work, schools are forgoing the concept of homework in an effort to balance out the rigor of classes.

Other schools are adopting a similar plan for greatly reduced homework. Again, the argument is that the school day is tough enough—jam-packed with more difficult instruction and classwork. Students are encouraged to complete work outside of the classroom only when extra practice is necessary. This alleviates the “homework for homework’s sake” issue that both parents and students push back against. For example, teachers may provide additional optional worksheets, practices, or websites to peruse for students who would like extra practice with a concept or skill.

Many teachers are becoming proponents of the exit card or entry card in place of checking homework assignments for grades. These small, graded assignments at the opening or closing of a lesson act as check-ins, much like homework. Instead of students taking work home to exhibit their understanding, teachers issue brief formative assessments, like an exit card, to establish whether or not students have mastered the concept on their own. This is just one method which replaces the need for homework without compromising the teacher’s ability to assess student progress.

Another method that teachers are utilizing in place of formal homework assignments is to use class time to complete essays or projects. The push for this comes from many perceived advantages. Workshopping papers during class time allows teachers to have a more hands-on approach to helping students with their writing. This also provides useful opportunities for students to practice peer editing and revision. In terms of group projects, class time to work allows collaborative opportunities without the stress of planning to meet outside of school, which can be difficult for students who cannot drive. Finally, classwork allows students the opportunity to ask questions and receive help in real time. With homework, assignments that are difficult or confusing add another layer of frustration, since help is not always immediately available at home.

Homework Help: Easy and Effective Advice

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Homework: some parents and educators are huge proponents of it—others, not so much. The pros and cons of homework have long been debated; however, its role in your child’s education can be very influential. If homework is a reality at your child’s school, I am sure that you have dealt with the tears, tantrums, and stressors related to the sometimes daunting task. So, how can we manage to make homework less intimidating and more effective? Below are some problem-solving strategies for your child’s homework woes.

Insist that your child keep an agenda, homework calendar, or planner. Whatever you choose to call it, it is the first line of defense against homework stress. Schools typically issue a planner to each student at the start of the school year, but if this is not the case at your child’s school, be sure to purchase one. Writing down homework during class is an imperative step for ensuring that homework is completed or attempted. Not only will writing it down help with memory of the assignment, but it also ensures that you as a parent will know what the assignment is, when it was issued, and when it is due.

On a similar note, be sure that you encourage your child to write down the full details of the assignment. Often in a hurry, students jot down a vague idea of the homework with little detail. This is not much help when homework time begins. Instruct your child to write down the homework as specifically as possible, i.e., the page number, website, number of questions, or chapters to read.

Stress the importance of effort. We have all experienced those ugly moments when frustration takes over. I (not-so-fondly) remember shedding plenty of tears at the kitchen counter over factor trees…and geometry…and algebra…and precalculus homework. Needless to say, math caused a lot of stress in my household growing up. Many families can relate to this struggle. That said, remember to express the importance of simply attempting a complicated assignment. Completion for the sake of credit is not always worth the hours of frustration. Instead, when homework hits the fan, send a quick email to your child’s teacher explaining the effort that your child put into the assignment. Homework is, after all, about the practice of the skills taught at school.

Stay organized with homework assignments. This means not only helping your child organize and keep track of different tasks for their many subject areas, but helping her to organize her time for lengthy or multi-step projects. When more complex or involved assignments come home, create a realistic schedule or timeline for completion. This will help your child begin to build time management skills and help avoid the weekend meltdown. When large assignments are pushed off, the procrastination creates unnecessary stress, which can make the assignment nearly unmanageable. Avoid this by modeling your own time management strategies—show your child different methods of completing lengthy tasks in a timely, organized fashion.

Problems at School: For Parents of Middle Schoolers

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Middle school is arguably one of the biggest leaps for students in terms of educational transitions. Gone are the days of your child having one classroom for all subjects. Gone is the ease of contacting one teacher for any issue at school. And, gone are the training wheels of support and constant micromanagement. This is not to say that success in middle school is completely left up to the child, but it is much different from the hand holding that you have been accustomed to seeing at the elementary level. Up until now, as a parent you have been there for your learner every step of the way, and elementary school has made it easy to monitor, assist, and motivate your child. However, now that your child has reached middle school, the responsibilities begin to shift from the teachers and parents to the students. This is not always an easy transition for parents or children—however, middle school is the place to learn and develop these self-advocacy skills. So, how can you best assist your middle schooler as she navigates through this transitional time in her education? The truth is, there is no quick fix or recipe for success when it comes to parental involvement at school. There are, however, a few suggestions to answer parents’ frequently asked questions.

FAQ: How can I help my middle schooler if his or her grades are slipping?
Since middle school can be an abrupt change, your child may find that academics are suddenly more difficult. If you notice a slip in motivation, it is essential to nip it in the bud early. Talk with your middle schooler at home before contacting teachers. It is important that your child begins to feel a sense of ownership in his or her education. If parents go over their child’s head and take it directly to the teacher, the child will view this as a negative move. Not only are you disregarding your child’s place in the conversation, but you are also sending the message that he or she needs you to fix the problems or clean up the messes at school. A key component of middle school is the idea that students become their own agents of change for their education. Instead of immediately contacting the teacher, have an open and honest conversation about what is happening with recent school work. Allow your child to explain how he is struggling. Then brainstorm suggestions and methods for your child to get extra help on his own.

FAQ: What should I do if I think my child is being bullied?
Unfortunately, we have all been there. Middle school can be downright ugly and painful for many children. This is not a coincidence—this transitional time is marked by hormonal changes, insecurities, and the typical desire to be accepted by peers. With these commonalities comes an unfortunate tendency to be self-absorbed, self-conscious, and openly cruel if it means fitting in. If you notice that your middle schooler is exhibiting signs of bullying, be sure to first validate your child’s concerns and feelings about the social issue at school by listening. When children are systematically bullied, they are made to feel isolated and insecure. The first thing that they need is to know that you are in their corner. Do not downplay the bullying; do not minimize the impact or imply that your child should toughen up.

FAQ: At what point should I involve the school if there are bullying or social issues?
Because the consequences of bullying can be severe, especially in middle school during those formative years, it is essential to have conversations with the school immediately. Do not insert yourself in conversations with the other child or their parents—the school should be the liaison when it comes to bullying incidents. As thoroughly as possible, gather details about each incident, such as who, what, when, and where the bullying occurred. Remember, bullying is often defined as repeated instances of aggression, intimidation, or humiliation revolving around an imbalance of power or strength. One rude comment or act is not classified as bullying. If the bullying is happening in a cyber realm, document and print the evidence of cyberbullying. When meeting with the school, ask to meet before or after school hours. This will alleviate your child’s anxiety about the bullying increasing by “tattling.”